i love the picture of a bare tree. it is a picture of perfect life to me. void of color, of outward thriving life, but yet very much alive. it is how the tree survives, even in the roughest, coldest season, it finds a way to still remain living.

enough about the trees, that is not why i put the picture up, although they are kinda neat. i love the idea of a path that you cannot see the end of. this picture exemplifies it for me: a bridge clearly showing you cross here, but a shady, foggy haze awaits you outside your immediate vision. you know you are supposed to cross, but you have no clue where you are going. i feel God does this repeatedly in our lives in order that continue not to rely on our short-sided vision where we can only see a few meters ahead, but have complete trust, aka faith, that the path will lead us to where we need to go.

the other aspect of this picture i draw inspiration from is the aspect of the bridge path itself. the idea of walking or following a path has a lot of unseen meaning behind it. it speaks of how you, the follower, leaves all the experiences, joys, and failures behind, not looking back, but keeping yourself focus on the now, the what's right in front of you. even the bridge aspect, an impassable barrier, or even just a barrier that will make you dirty to wade through it, a bridge is the thought of you overcoming the greatest (or smallest) barriers in order to continue on your path.

i mean, roughly speaking, how well would a stroll through the woods be if all you did was watch the scenery behind you, or continue peering over the ledge onto what seems to be impending stress? it would cause you more harm to to do that than even to just not go on the path at all.

one thing i am learning now is that these paths are not meant for sprinters. i very much live in an idealists world, and once i have my mind on a certain goal, i go 134.6% (on average) to accomplish that goal. when in actuality, sprinting into haze, though not focusing on all you leave behind or under, you dont get to experience every detail and intricacy because you are moving so fast that it all becomes a blur, to the point where the path turns but you are so focused on finishing the path that you blow right past the turn that actually is clearly marked.

conclusion: live in each moment that God walks along side of you. i watched kung fu panda recently (i know kinda off subject, but anyways. . .) and they used one quote in there that always makes me rethink how i live my life:

". . . you are too concerned with what was and what will be. Yesterday is history, tomorrow is mystery, today is a gift, that's why it's called the present."

im perfect!

isnt it amazing how full of myself i am! but sometimes, the truth just has to be said. i am exactly what the titled says, im perfect!

ok so you who actually know me, know i don't normally speak like this, so there has to be a reason behind it, right? well yeah, you guessed it, spoiler!

isn't it amazing how one little space changes the whole meaning of a phrase. for instance, im perfect! become imperfect! and in reality, that is what i actually am. as much as i always try to do the right thing, show the good side of me off, lead by example, there is always another side that never seems to be spoken off or ever found out. and the worst part is i have had 27 years of hiding my faults and insecurities, so long that i have practically perfected the hiding technique to the point where im quite certain EVERY person i have EVER come into contact with does not know the whole me. isn't that a sad thing to say. and yet i still always seem to be ok with who i am and who i continue to be.

as much as i am able to be my solitary self here on earth, it still freaks me out that i still don't know myself as well as God does. As the Bible reminds us constantly, God not only knows us better than ourselves, He also cares for us much more than we do, more than we ever can imagine. i have walked this so called christian life for some time now, and i still don't believe i have totally grasp the "infinite" aspect of God's love. it really is a raging love that runs over everything to get to you, a consuming hug that envelopes you, your faults, your insecurities, your potential, your dreams, your accomplishments, and even you blatant hatred for who He is. just think about that, it is repeated that Jesus died for all, so that means the man/woman who on a daily basis curses at God, all He does is look down, open His arms trying to reach out to grab them and surround them. this is how that despite our best efforts to separate ourselves from God by doing what we feel is good, and make us happy, not only does God not flinch or move, He actually tries to move closer towards us. we are His creation, His beloved. our lives are not meaningless or inconsequential, it doesnt matter how we look, if we're skinny or fat, if we're popular or outcasts, what we're addicted to, all it comes down to is that God loved us first, before it all, before we ever formed a word in our mouth, before our first breathe of oxygen into our fresh new lungs, and He will continue to consume us with His love until our dying breathe.

wow.